(Heather's mother Daphne, the author) I was
teaching at Girard Middle school that year when I was summoned to
the front office. The principal of Girard Elementary school,
located just across the street, was on the phone for me. I'd
known Joanne for several years; she had been my daughterStacey's teacher for one year. So I could tell by the sound of her voice she was distressed. "I'm sorry to have to call you like this, Daphne," she began, "But we had a little incident here today, and I had to paddle Heather." She went on to describe how Heather had pitched an all-out screaming, crying, stomping fit in the bathroom. The teacher called the principal, who couldn't get Heather to stop either-until she swatted her bottom. Joanne continued, "I want you to know how badly I feel about this; I hated doing it. But I just didn't feel I had any choice. We simply can't allow her to pitch that kind of temper tantrum anymore." Anymore? "You mean this has happened before?" I asked. "Well,...yes, A number of times."
In or meeting later that day, I got the full report. Her tantrums were wreaking havoc in the entire classroom. Again Joanne expressed regret for paddling Heather. I told her "If you don't let the other children do something, don't let Heather do it either. Should you need to paddle her again, you have my permission." I went home that day thinking that in their good-hearted attempt to be compassionate and patient with Heather, they had merely tried to make allowances for her deafness.
In a way, the reaction of the teacher and principal reminded me of an encounter I had in a store just months before. I'd been walking down an aisle pushing my shopping cart, when I realized Heather was no longer by my side. She'd stopped to grab a bag of candy off one of the bottom shelves. When I told her to put it back she had just stood there and stared at me, her eyes full of defiance. When I told her again "Put it back!" and started toward her to enforce the order, she launched into a crying, foot-stomping temper tantrum. I took a firm hold of her arm and told her "stop it right now!"
Heather's volume only increased. So I spun her around and swatted her on the behind. Then I looked her in the face and said "Now stop and put the candy back!"
A woman there wanted to turn me in for child abuse for hitting a deaf child who couldn't understand her. I told her that Heather knew exactly what was expected of her and was merely being defiant.